Strong....people :]

today i'm gonna START off with a quote. :]
"Even famous people break down.... but the strong people are the ones who bring themselves back up after breaking down."

Today i went to go watch twilight with my best freaking friend, Su, and her friend Lisa at the La Habra regal theatre. it was awesomely... :] we had starbucks...and pick up stix. we went over to Lisa's house... she had a cute kitty :] we just hung out... guitar hero... computer... pictures.. LOL.
twilight was ehh.. not bad... not really really good either... just i liked it is all :]

today was a pretty good day... until i got home. got sucky news... from a friend... not in a very good mood anymore. and i talked to Su on the phone.. i love her<3 i believe she's gonna be there for me whenever... wherever. she's in a band... and so she goes on tours to other states and concerts... and she's offered me to go to her concerts and tours with her... FOR FREE with backstage stuff and EVERYTHING. it's pretty cool. only thing is... school. that's the SUCKY part... but she said there might be a tour during the summer... soif i'm gone half the summer.. xP
you know where i am :D

I feel as if i can tell her ANYTHING... one reason why is cuz she doesnt know anyone at oxford... and i believe we won't tell each other's secrets. :]
.....
Now moving on... to more serious stuff... not that ^ isn't serious it is. :]

I'm seriously not going to care at all... the problems of those who backlash... who are indifferent towards me...

Life is getting too messed up.
"biters" WHO CARES? they prolly look up to you or they just want to try it out... don't freaking lash out at them. WHO freaking CARES?

"bitches" Everyone's a bitch. we bitch everyday... Drama... gossip... don't say you don't. cuz everyone does.

"whores" First of all, no one's ever DONE it... at least the people some people call "whores". second of all, that's just reading the cover and throwing the book away... do you even know what kind of people they are?

"Sluts" maybe they are sluts... but i think this term is just used to go BLAHHH U ARE SHITTT!!! to someone... that's just messed.

the jokes... are not jokes. They're not even funny anymore. they're just sick, perverted, and disgustingly VILE. You might think it's funny to make fun of someone that nobody likes. hell, even i don't like certain people... but i don't make jokes about them. some jokes are hilarious... but most aren't.

yeahh everyone... backstabs their friends at least once. EVERYONE. it's a sin, and it's intentional, No matter how much people HATE backstabbers. I backstab... others backstab. I swear... it's so messed up. I'm going to change myself... are you?

Don't kid yourself... there's so many intentional mistakes... don't lie to yourself so much that you think it's true. The most horrible things you do to a friend.... can all be intentional. It's horrifying... i know... but it's the truth. take it in... and apologize... :] even if the person has NO CLUE about it whatsoever... still give them a hug... and apologize. I can't go on a day with guilt for possibly making a friend sad... or pissed. Even if it isn't my fault, I'd apologize for even having this fight. I HATE fights. stop FIGHTING. i swear. you might think everything's going downhill and no one's there... but it's AFFECTING EVERYONE close to you and people who care for you.

I probably think that the person I'm talking to will EVER see this, but i think you made a HUGE mistake today. a HUGE mistake. "efforts aren't equal" then MAKE IT EQUAL. "better girls out there" HELL i swear you're only saying that BS to make things easier for yourself. I am not pissed at you for breaking it off... but i'm pissed at you for giving up so easily... i scorn you for letting it all go... no matter how big it was.... how special it was to you... i dislike... you for letting this pass by you... to not try. I swear... i tried so hard to keep you guys from falling apart... but it's done. you did it. you didn't even CONSIDER what he said about you being so close to your best friend, he was uncomfortable.. but you didn't even consider it and you just kept on being close. maybe i have no right to be talking like this... maybe i have no right at all to even say that you blew it. but i don't care anymore. you hurt yourself as well as him today. I feel as if you didn't even TRY. i feel as if it was all talk.... you NEVER talked to him...DIRECTLY... i swear you talk to your friends about the problem more than to him. maybe one of your friends will understand who you are... and show you this. I don't care if you hate me... or if your friends do. u KNOW how hard i tried to keep you guys together... you KNOW. Maybe i'm being selfish... my role models are now falling apart. I don't think... I understand what you're going through anymore.... I don't know you... my best friends are falling apart... think about it. How do you expect me to go on and pretend this isn't a big deal? I hope you read this... and when you do... i hope you call me... and i expect you to respond to this. I dont care if you lash out at me... if you say your sorry... i want an explanation. you might think i'm being harsh... but right now... i am SCARY... you hurt my best friends.... yourself and him. maybe i'm going on and on and on.... but right now... i'm in a fury... i DONT get it. i dont get you anymore. i dont get him for not hating you. and i dont get myself for even trying. that's all i have to say. I hope you rethink on what you did. I really really really hope you do.